Ridiculocity: My Self-Musings.

16 Jun

Kit & I often joke and talk about being self-aware and me being an Elitist. As I’ve mentioned before, I regard blogging as a narcissistic hobby, considering I really only do it because I (and my 3 readers) think I’m amusing. So therefore, in the spirit of self-awareness, I would like to make some confessions in the form of a list of things about which I am an elitist (and why!). Enjoy.

Also note: These are in no specific order other than my stream-of-consciousness (which can’t be explained whatsoever).

1. Peaches– Someone agree with me here! There are define levels of peach-awesomeness. At the top are mountain peaches, preferably those grown in the mountains of NC (which we all know is my home). I will also eat white meat peaches, which make a lovely peach cobbler- FYI. I can’t speak for the west coast (Leah, what’s the status?), but there may be an acceptable type out there too. The problem is sandhill peaches. Ew. Either they’re mealy or too squishy, or the skin’s really fuzzy and hard to peel off, or they’re too tart… No good, I say.

2. Hair Salons– One of my life mantras is that I do not believe in $13 hair cuts (The exception to this rule is mens’ haircuts. Boys, have at it. Go to the barber. Go to the mall. Whatever.). Once, my older sister, Meredith (who is now a fabulous hair dresser, btw) got a haircut at the mall. The “hairdresser” was supposed to trim Meredith’s thick, long hair- blunt at the bottom. She had Meredith turn her head UPSIDE DOWN “In order to get the underneath layers,” since her hair is so thick. I only wish I had a picture of that experience. I’m sorry; call me bitchy or snobby, or whatever… But I want my hair to look like I have an expensive haircut. And the only way to do that (unless you have a friend/family member who’s very talented) is to pay for it. And that, I am willing to do.

3. Music– There isn’t much to say about this other than to state the fact that there is way too much talent in the world for me to waste my time listening to shitty music. The end.

4. Weddings– A lot of my friends (and peers whom I don’t even know) are getting married these days, so I’m creating my opinions on all things wedding related. I may post an entire blog on it someday. I would consider myself about as non-traditional as it gets, but some things just shouldn’t be done. Like black wedding dresses. Or dogs as flower girls/ring bearers. Or trashy-looking engagement photos.

5. Grapes– I just realized this tonight as I was sifting through my container of grapes pressing them to find the ones with the correct turger pressure and discarding the others. There’s nothing worse than a gross, squishy, bitter grape.

6. Driving Abilities or lack thereof. I like to think I’m a great driver. And by that I mean, I’m capable of multi-tasking and paying attention to what I’m doing. However, this is not the case for many and most drivers. I hate semi’s that drive in the left lane. I hate slow people going down the mountain that ride their brakes the whole time. I hate it when people don’t turn right on red, when they have the opportunity. Yellow lights mean speed up unless there’s no chance you’re making it through. Assume I’m in a hurry, because whether or not I am, I’m not trying to dilly-dally around and mosey towards my destination. I want to get there as soon as possible, thank you.

This is all I can think of off the top of my head. If you can think of any I’m forgetting, feel free to alert me & I’ll address them.


2 Responses to “Ridiculocity: My Self-Musings.”

  1. Meredith June 16, 2010 at 9:55 pm #

    I’m thankful for my shout out– also, I need to get you some of my business cards to stick somewhere in your hair considering it’s getting so much attention these days πŸ™‚ oh yeah, and to ramble more– a new “thing you love” should be the Bravo show “work of art”. You and Kit both will be enthralled


  1. Cheap Haircuts Look Cheap « Life according to Rachel - May 26, 2011

    […] close to my heart. You’ve probably heard me say it, or read when I touched on it in this post. Call me elitist (you probably already do if you read this blog at all) if you want, but […]

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