Here’s the thing about snow:

31 Jan

I hate snow.

I’ve spent a considerable amount of time thinking about snow, and have concluded that there are no genuinely positive things about it. Therefore, I’ve decided to compile a list of reasons as to why I hate snow. It is as follows:

1. SNOW IS COLD.

  • This is a con for several reasons. Numbness being the first. If you’ve ever been out in the snow, then gone inside to warm up & felt that tingling/burning sensation in your fingers & toes, you know what I mean. It’s miserable.
  • Some people might say, “Cold weather is better than warm weather, because you can always put on more layers, but you can only take so many off.” The problem with this thought process is that wearing multiple layers causes your core to overheat, while your digits are still frostbitten, and in addition to that awkward feeling, it takes 20 minutes to take your layers off when you inevitably have to use the bathroom (or try on clothes, when shopping).

2. SNOW IS WET.

  • The main problem with snow being wet is footwear. Let’s be honest. NO ONE looks cute in snow boots. Personally, if I have to go out in the dreaded precipitation, I’d at least like some semi-cute footwear. Within the available genres of shoes, several are eliminated right off the bat: any type of sandal (which you shouldn’t be wearing anyway), heels (obviously. heels + snow/ice/water = you on your ass on the pavement, which leads me to my next problem with snow being wet), & tennis shoes (which will soak through immediately). This leaves you with rain galoshes, flats, and other waterproof boots (such as leather). Flats are out because they fill with water through the sides, on top of providing little to no insulation for warmth. No one wants to wear their good leather boots out in the nasty slush/ice, and rain boots were engineered for rain, not ice, which means they have no traction and offer no warmth either.
  • Since we’ve established that there is no aesthetically acceptable footwear (and most North Carolinians probably don’t own a pair of real snow boots), you’re probably wearing less than ideal shoes for the inclement weather. This means, inevitably, you will fall down, at some point in the day. And when you do, you’re not going to be able to get up easily, because there’s nothing to ground you in order to help you stand up. And the longer you stay down there, yep- you got it!- the more water soaks through your clothing.

3. SNOW IS DANGEROUS (especially for driving)

  • I’m aware that you can drive safely in the snow. My wonderful Wisconsin-bred boyfriend has proven that fact to me multiple times. But, the fact of the matter is, those of us below the Mason-Dixon line that don’t encounter snow 9 out of 12 months of the year don’t know how to deal with it when it comes. This means the people who are out driving shouldn’t be, and when they do, they get in wrecks, therefore making it more dangerous for even those who drive well.

There is a whole list of other various negatives associated with snow, such as hail denting cars and houses, ice weighing down trees and power lines, and a whole slew of sledding related accidents. My own father has a scar under his chin from a sledding accident gone wrong and a nurse who didn’t know how to do stitches correctly.

All I’m saying is, a few snowballs & a nice view out my window is not enough to make snow “worth it” for me.

5 months ’til summer. I can’t wait.

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